Dear Jonathon,

Please accept my heartfelt apologies for the retraction of our "12 for the price of 8 at 39p" offer on our crumpets. Whilst I appreciate that this will cause some alterations in the agenda of your "elevenses" meetings, I firmly believe that change can be very beneficial. Traditions, as they say, were made to be broken!

The twelve crumpets offer, I am sorry to say, has finished and they are now 52 pence. However, all is not lost as there are reward points available on these crumpets. These reward points can be exchanged for vouchers which will enable to buy other goods. In considering the stance Pooh would have taken in this matter, I firmly believe he would advocate the purchase of honey, Tigger might require a new spring, and Rabbit may well be tempted by our organic carrots.
Alternatively, you can transfer your reward points into air miles and visit your favourite characters at Disney World, Paris, or perhaps take a glorious stroll through "Hundred Acre Wood" and listen for the succinct sounds of Owl, Eeyore, and the rumblings of Gopher.
The possibilities are endless!

I hope this has given the society some hope and softened this terrible blow. If you should require any more information or simply wish to make your views known, please do not hesitate to contact me at the above address. lf Pooh should disagree with me, please let me know.

Yours sincerely

Mr Norman White - a.k.a Christopher Robin
Meat Manager

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