Ben M. Parker
Pembroke College
Cambridge CB2 1RF

13 January, 1998

Dear Mr Gates,

I am writing on behalf of the Pembroke College Winnie-The-Pooh Society, a society, which exists to promote the works of A.A. Milne, the greatest author of all time, around the world, but especially in Pembroke College, Cambridge, part of the great university where you have had business yourself in recent months.

I am sorry that I'm not writing to you concerning more pleasant a subject, as I feel it would only be Pooh-like and friendly to broach tis subject in more civilised circumstances, perhaps over a mug of tea and some hunny sandwiches. However, it is my unpleasant duty to inform you that, at a recent meeting of the Pembroke College Winnie-The-Pooh Society, you were censured by majority vote for producing the Microsoft Office spell checker in such a way that it does not recognise "Winnie-the-Pooh", "A.A. Milne", "Eeyore", "Wol", or many of Rabbit's friends and relations

We also, as a society, feel that it would be most appropriate were you to include these words in the next version of your product, which, incidentally, we wish you every success with. As an added bonus to your marketing campaign, perhaps a large friendly coloured sticker could be affixed to the box, boldly proclaiming that your product is "Friendly with Bears," although, of course, perhaps the exact details could be run in front of your marketing department as a courtesy.

We appreciate the demands on your time must be severe, but would like to invite you as our honoured guest to come to an Elevenses Meeting of the society, held every Saturday at 4 p.m. during full term, although we would appreciate your bringing a mug if you'd like tea. Should you be otherwise committed in the near future, perhaps you could reply to this letter, indicating what action you are planning to take in light of the fault we have discovered with your product?

With many thanks for your time,

Ben M. Parker

(President and Piglet, The Pembroke College Winnie-the-Pooh Society)

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