Minutes of a somewhat cramped Elevenses Meeting

The Secretary's room (room 7), 2 Selwyn Gardens, 4:10pm 18th April 1998

Present: Alison, Chris Emmerson, Andrew, James, Henry, Stephen, Ben, Rob, Anthony
Apologies: Sibylle, Yasmin, Kirsten, the Lady Foundress.

1. An extra-constitutional (is that right...? well, we didn't constitutionally have to have a meeting) and slightly damp meeting is opened by Andrew, in the presence of Alison and Chris, with Rob on the intercom.
   


2. Sub-aquatic bicycles in the watercourses of Cambridge are discussed, in relation to Ben's bike's recent state of stolen-ness.
   


3. We discuss Ben's recent activities with sixth form schoolgirls from Kings Lynn.
   


4. "It's either north, or Homerton" - our guide to Cambridge geography, and finding dodgy looking pubs (the pub is probably dodgy even without Andrew and Ben, though obviously they can't observe whether or not this is true.....)
   


5. Stephen arrives, followed a short while later by Ben, Henry (from Caius) and James.
   


6. Alison reads the minutes of the last meeting.
   


7. Anthony arrives, and the conversation deviates to electrical installations in Selwyn Gardens, and ways to operate heating systems. A favourite topic of conversation in the Hundred Acre Wood, no doubt.
   


8. Rob arrives, and tells us about Sibylle's unfortunate attack of the dreaded lergy, which means that she is unable to be with us. Whether or not we could fit in the room would be a problem if she were here.
   


9. The word "deliquescent" is discussed in detail. Eventually we find a dictionary to see what it actually means, but this rather knocks the fun out of the conversation.
   


10. The pronunciation of "vase" as "varz" or "vayz" is discussed.
    


11. Ben is congratulated for the quality of the last set of minutes...
    


12. ...then he is censured for the mistakes in them.
    


13. The minutes of the last but one meeting are read by James, as is a silly letter to Sainsbury's.
    


14. "More eloquence is needed" in our discussions, someone suggests.
    


15. Ben doesn't want to let Sainsbury's know who he is. Henry points out he is sending them a signed letter...
    


16. Pooh shirts are discussed. T-shirts? or M, Y or q shirts? What would a theta shirt look like?
    


17. Rob tries to remember the last time he was logged on. He tells us that the NUS conference had a minute's silence when a fictional character in an antipodean colonial soap-opera died. It's good to know they care about the real issues.
    


18. Monday the first of April fell on a Wednesday this year. We needed a diary to check this fact....
    


19. James attempts to make a constitutionally valid proposal of membership for Henry. This was asking for constitutional crisis, but luckily the secretary had a copy of the sacred document to hand.....
    
(Ben - do you think they'd put it on that website with all those other, more minor, documents like the Magna Carta?) We all rise for the reading of the constitution, apart from those who stay sat down.


20. Clause III is read, re-read, and interpreted in many ways. Some interpretations are sensible, so are immediately discounted. Others are taken for further discussion.
    


21. James, the James, decides that:
    
    Applications for membership from persons resident within the
    University but not qualifying under Clause III may be considered if
    supported by a member of the Committee, and shall be ratified by motion
    of the membership at any meeting.
    
    means that the applicant must be physically supported by a member of the committee. Hence...
    


22. ...Henry sits on Ben's lap. He is accepted as a member. He pays his Pooh levy to the secretary.
    


23. Andrew has to go and give it to the treasurer when she gets back. It's a hard job, but...
    


24. A Very Very Complex Vote to make Chris Emerson eligible for membership is proposed by Ben. After much discussion we come up with a motion which has the twin advantages of being constitutionally sound and so complicated it can probably be interpreted to mean pretty much anything we want or need it to.
    F4 A1 Ab4 Chris is now eligible for membership, increasing the Homerton contingent in PoohSoc.
    


25. In lieu of a one pound sterling Pooh levy, he pays with one pound of chocolate. Well, 450g, but he pays the sum of one pence cash to cover the other 4g. Will three bars of Galaxy fit in the treasury?
    We'll have to be careful... as it's not Nestle chocolate it might get embezzled.
    


26. He is proposed as a member. F6 A1 Ab2. He is now officially a member.
    


27. We ask (the) James if he will list his official engagements for Saturday 18th April, but he doesn't.
    


28. Rob goes to make his bed and lie on it.
    


29. We attempt to start The Reading - "In which Eeyore has a birthday and gets two presents".
    


30. Martin Weber wanders in, then rapidly retreats. If only all economics was done in chocolate currency-equivalents.
    


31. The well-known Chigwell speciality, Weissella, are eaten.
    


32. Andrew met someone Ben knows at Sainsbury's today. Ben says he'll go to see her, but we suspect she may not still be there.
    


33. Alison has eaten. She did "toast" on Wednesday night..... this is possibly dodgy if anyone actually knew what it meant. But the quotes are important.
    


34. "James better start if I have to do something complicated" - Henry.
    


35. Ben suggests we read "Crystalline Solids" instead of Pooh.
    


36. We train Alison to sound depressed so she can read Eeyore's part. Andrew suggests that reading "Crystalline Solids" would help.
    


37. We all hum Cottleston Pie, and Anthony sings it.
    


38. "that was the first verse"
    


39. If Alison is Eeyore too often the suicide rate in PoohSoc will shoot up. She is now TOO depressing.
    


40. James is censure for saying he can narrate however he wants. F6 A0 Ab2
    


41. The reading continues in melodramatic style.
    


42. Andrew is the "as if". Is the subconscious a part of Pooh?
    


43. Rob returns, and we vote to close F5 A2 Ab2. We depart for a trough, completely surrounded by water.
    

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