Minutes of the Pembroke College Winnie-the-Pooh Society Punting Expoitition
Saturday 14th March 1998
Present: Ben, Andrew, Rob, Jenny, Michael, Rachel Dixon. Three Sheila-ites (spit)
- The race against Shelia and her Dog (spit spit) is prepared. Complaints are made that
Granny is rocking the boat. Rob minutes.
- Shelia (spit) are punting from the wrong end - but what can you expect?
- The rules for the punting competition - the winner will be the first to pass the original
testaments in Trinity Library.
- From the off the "Loyal Friend", the PoohSoc punt, goes ahead, punted by Andrew.
- Incompetent punters are sighted ahead.
- Vote that Shelia (spit) are useless - unanimus
- Vote that Rachel may vote in the meeting
F4 A2 Ab0
- There are too many canoes on the river today.
- We have already lost sight of Shelia (spit), we are so far ahead
- Granny is good at punting, due to his experience of thrusting with long poles.
- Naive US tourists go by.
- Sheila have changed punter, and are catching up.
- We are a bridge ahead of them.
- Granny wants to go slowly past Tit Hall in case we see Babs. (Allegedly.)
At this point Jenny takes over the minuting from Rob
- Rob is very nasty and wants a little kiddie to fall in and splash the ducks.
- We pass the sacred testaments and declare ourselves the winners.
- We announce who we are to some tourists in another punt, and Rob begins to read "In
which Piglet is entirely surrounded by water".
- We hear an interesting story about St John's clock (or lack thereof) from eavesdropping a
tour punt.
- Rob echoes whilst going under a bridge, and admires a female punter.
- The reading is postponed.
- We go ashore at John's - well, Rob does - and Mike and Granny swap
places so Michael is now punting back. But Tiggers don't like water.
- Ben is rude to some Australians who smash into a wall, and Rob joins in when they crawl
along the wall.
- Vote to censure the punt company for missing the hyphens in Winnie-the-Pooh.
F6 A0 Ab0 Spoilt ballot 1 Motion passed.
Rob takes over the minuting
- Sheila (spit) finally come back into view as we are returning back to the Anchor. We
have lapped them!
- Shelia (spit) shoot Ben with an obscenely large water pistol/gun/artillery piece.
- "We got so far down the river we picked up duty free on the way to the Netherlands."
Maybe.
- We bump the incompetent punters from minute 5.
Jenny takes over the minutes.
- Rob and Michael swap. Michael must be congratulated on not having fallen in whilst
being in control of the punt.
- "Don't stand there because you'll get Jenny wet and you can't push very hard" - Michael.
- Sheila (spit) are doing it backwards.
- Michael continues the reading.
- He can't be bothered to finish the reading. Splitter.
- A guide describes the UL as phallic to his tourists.
- Sheila (spit) have huge soak-soak sticks.
- Rob - "only the best for Sheila - spit"
- Michael takes over the reading as Sheila (spit) go up the creek.
- Rob undresses Jenny. A scarf comes off.
- Ben gets hit by a heretic and the boat gets hit.
- WALL!!!
- The bastards chuck Nestle Smarties into the punt. To my (i.e. Jenny's)
disgust members of PoohSoc start eating them.
- Sheila are playing very dirty.
- Ben tells Michael to stick it in there.
- Tanya is spotted crossing the bridge.
- Ben promises to ring her. What will Andrea say?
- The enemy corner us and we struggle over the poles.
- Granny boards the enemy, and gets soaked.
- They shoot us, and the minuting paper gets wet.
- Granny takes control, but immediately loses the pole in an arboreal incident. He makes
a swift recovery, showing what a wonderful, multi-talented, chap he is.
- Rachel take some of their guns, and everyone except Jenny gets soaked in a revenge
attack - the advantage of being quiet and peaceful.
- We escape with their paddle and an umbrella (the advantage of having less quiet and peaceful people on board to protect the quiet and peaceful people).
- We arrive back at the Mill and are without doubt victorious.
- Granny drips on Jenny.
- Vote to escalate hostilities with Sheila (spit).
F7 A0 Ab0 motion carried.
- A dog walks by with crimped hair.
- Granny accosts an old King's bloke to take a photo of us all.
- "We're buggering off and you're not invited" says Rob.
- Vicky owes Granny one.
- So does Ben.
- Votes to change the punting meeting into an elevenses meeting.
F4 A0 Ab2 motion carried
- We find Yasmin, Oliver and friends (Tim and Chris) on Sidgewick Avenue. However, we lose Rachel.
- Minutes of a damp elevenses meeting in room 20, at 2 Selwyn Gardens. Andrew takes control of the minutes. Apologies have been received from Tony, Kirsten and Sibylle.
- Ben has some arms length gloves in his bag... but who do they belong to?
- Oliver reads last week's minutes. A vote to censure Andrew for the minutes not being up to the normal standard takes place. Apparently the minutes are too much like a factual record of what actually took place during the meeting. Motion passed, though Jenny votes against.
- Michael is censured for not paying attention. F4 A2 Ab3.
- Rob reads the minutes of the Curry Mahal meeting last night, and is censored for having a poor sense of humour.
- Ben forgot the word for "lorry" yesterday.
- Sheila (spit) attracts all the weirdoes in Cambridge, whereas PCWtPSoc gets the Pembroke ones. A better class of weirdo, obviously.
- Ben is the 8th Deadly Sin.
- Vote to allow the visitors to vote, passed unanimously.
- Hexing, and the burning of effigies and dressing gowns of Sheila (spit) are discussed.
- Michael dries his leg with a hair dryer.
- Vicky says that Ben needs house training. Ben says that it would be fun to wear a nappy.
- The inevitable vote that Ben should wear a nappy to the next meeting.
F4 A3 Ab0
- Ben opens a committee meeting, which votes to overturn the previous vote F2 A1.
- "Ben is a cheating bugger". Passed.
- Vote to censure Ben for swearing F6 A3 Ab1
- Reading - "In which piglet does a very grand thing", preceded by a vote to make Andrew Owl. Ben husts and skips, as is now very traditional. F8 A2 Ab0.
I am now Owl.
- Ben proclaims that he fancies a shag (is this hugely appropriate for PoohSoc minutes... and who was this remark addressed to?).
- The tea is a little browner.
- The reading finally begins, in a cockney accent.
- Vote to close F5, A4, Ab0.
Return To Lent 1998
©The Pembroke College Winnie-The-Pooh Society 1998.
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