Minutes of the Pembroke College Winnie-the-Pooh Society Punting Expoitition
Saturday 14th March 1998

Present: Ben, Andrew, Rob, Jenny, Michael, Rachel Dixon. Three Sheila-ites (spit)


  1. The race against Shelia and her Dog (spit spit) is prepared. Complaints are made that Granny is rocking the boat. Rob minutes.

  2. Shelia (spit) are punting from the wrong end - but what can you expect?

  3. The rules for the punting competition - the winner will be the first to pass the original testaments in Trinity Library.

  4. From the off the "Loyal Friend", the PoohSoc punt, goes ahead, punted by Andrew.

  5. Incompetent punters are sighted ahead.

  6. Vote that Shelia (spit) are useless - unanimus

  7. Vote that Rachel may vote in the meeting
    F4 A2 Ab0

  8. There are too many canoes on the river today.

  9. We have already lost sight of Shelia (spit), we are so far ahead

  10. Granny is good at punting, due to his experience of thrusting with long poles.

  11. Naive US tourists go by.

  12. Sheila have changed punter, and are catching up.

  13. We are a bridge ahead of them.

  14. Granny wants to go slowly past Tit Hall in case we see Babs. (Allegedly.) At this point Jenny takes over the minuting from Rob

  15. Rob is very nasty and wants a little kiddie to fall in and splash the ducks.

  16. We pass the sacred testaments and declare ourselves the winners.

  17. We announce who we are to some tourists in another punt, and Rob begins to read "In which Piglet is entirely surrounded by water".

  18. We hear an interesting story about St John's clock (or lack thereof) from eavesdropping a tour punt.

  19. Rob echoes whilst going under a bridge, and admires a female punter.

  20. The reading is postponed.

  21. We go ashore at John's - well, Rob does - and Mike and Granny swap places so Michael is now punting back. But Tiggers don't like water.

  22. Ben is rude to some Australians who smash into a wall, and Rob joins in when they crawl along the wall.

  23. Vote to censure the punt company for missing the hyphens in Winnie-the-Pooh.
    F6 A0 Ab0 Spoilt ballot 1 Motion passed.
    Rob takes over the minuting

  24. Sheila (spit) finally come back into view as we are returning back to the Anchor. We have lapped them!

  25. Shelia (spit) shoot Ben with an obscenely large water pistol/gun/artillery piece.

  26. "We got so far down the river we picked up duty free on the way to the Netherlands." Maybe.

  27. We bump the incompetent punters from minute 5. Jenny takes over the minutes.

  28. Rob and Michael swap. Michael must be congratulated on not having fallen in whilst being in control of the punt.

  29. "Don't stand there because you'll get Jenny wet and you can't push very hard" - Michael.

  30. Sheila (spit) are doing it backwards.

  31. Michael continues the reading.

  32. He can't be bothered to finish the reading. Splitter.

  33. A guide describes the UL as phallic to his tourists.

  34. Sheila (spit) have huge soak-soak sticks.

  35. Rob - "only the best for Sheila - spit"

  36. Michael takes over the reading as Sheila (spit) go up the creek.

  37. Rob undresses Jenny. A scarf comes off.

  38. Ben gets hit by a heretic and the boat gets hit.

  39. WALL!!!

  40. The bastards chuck Nestle Smarties into the punt. To my (i.e. Jenny's) disgust members of PoohSoc start eating them.

  41. Sheila are playing very dirty.

  42. Ben tells Michael to stick it in there.

  43. Tanya is spotted crossing the bridge.

  44. Ben promises to ring her. What will Andrea say?

  45. The enemy corner us and we struggle over the poles.

  46. Granny boards the enemy, and gets soaked.

  47. They shoot us, and the minuting paper gets wet.

  48. Granny takes control, but immediately loses the pole in an arboreal incident. He makes a swift recovery, showing what a wonderful, multi-talented, chap he is.

  49. Rachel take some of their guns, and everyone except Jenny gets soaked in a revenge attack - the advantage of being quiet and peaceful.

  50. We escape with their paddle and an umbrella (the advantage of having less quiet and peaceful people on board to protect the quiet and peaceful people).

  51. We arrive back at the Mill and are without doubt victorious.

  52. Granny drips on Jenny.

  53. Vote to escalate hostilities with Sheila (spit).
    F7 A0 Ab0 motion carried.

  54. A dog walks by with crimped hair.

  55. Granny accosts an old King's bloke to take a photo of us all.

  56. "We're buggering off and you're not invited" says Rob.

  57. Vicky owes Granny one.

  58. So does Ben.

  59. Votes to change the punting meeting into an elevenses meeting.
    F4 A0 Ab2 motion carried

  60. We find Yasmin, Oliver and friends (Tim and Chris) on Sidgewick Avenue. However, we lose Rachel.

  61. Minutes of a damp elevenses meeting in room 20, at 2 Selwyn Gardens. Andrew takes control of the minutes. Apologies have been received from Tony, Kirsten and Sibylle.

  62. Ben has some arms length gloves in his bag... but who do they belong to?

  63. Oliver reads last week's minutes. A vote to censure Andrew for the minutes not being up to the normal standard takes place. Apparently the minutes are too much like a factual record of what actually took place during the meeting. Motion passed, though Jenny votes against.

  64. Michael is censured for not paying attention. F4 A2 Ab3.

  65. Rob reads the minutes of the Curry Mahal meeting last night, and is censored for having a poor sense of humour.

  66. Ben forgot the word for "lorry" yesterday.

  67. Sheila (spit) attracts all the weirdoes in Cambridge, whereas PCWtPSoc gets the Pembroke ones. A better class of weirdo, obviously.

  68. Ben is the 8th Deadly Sin.

  69. Vote to allow the visitors to vote, passed unanimously.

  70. Hexing, and the burning of effigies and dressing gowns of Sheila (spit) are discussed.

  71. Michael dries his leg with a hair dryer.

  72. Vicky says that Ben needs house training. Ben says that it would be fun to wear a nappy.

  73. The inevitable vote that Ben should wear a nappy to the next meeting.
    F4 A3 Ab0

  74. Ben opens a committee meeting, which votes to overturn the previous vote F2 A1.

  75. "Ben is a cheating bugger". Passed.

  76. Vote to censure Ben for swearing F6 A3 Ab1

  77. Reading - "In which piglet does a very grand thing", preceded by a vote to make Andrew Owl. Ben husts and skips, as is now very traditional. F8 A2 Ab0.
    I am now Owl.

  78. Ben proclaims that he fancies a shag (is this hugely appropriate for PoohSoc minutes... and who was this remark addressed to?).

  79. The tea is a little browner.

  80. The reading finally begins, in a cockney accent.

  81. Vote to close F5, A4, Ab0.


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©The Pembroke College Winnie-The-Pooh Society 1998.

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